so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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