I just saw a hot homeless man
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
