We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize