Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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