So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
The feeling are messing with the penis
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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