That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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