Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
