yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
