Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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