Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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