I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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