True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
