i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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