What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Just pee around me
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
