Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
i am craving dick and cupcakes
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
