i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
