it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I deserve this hangover.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
