Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
