Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
