I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
