i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Randomize
