shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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