I hate your face
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
