Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
