i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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