Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
