Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
