For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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