GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
