hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
