You surviving the open bar?
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she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
