nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'd cum for enchiladas.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
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