No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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