i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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