is your mom at the bar?
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
We don't watch enough power rangers
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
