My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
what day is it and did you see me today?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
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