I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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