It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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