STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
is wine microwaveable?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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