Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
