How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
