You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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