Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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