He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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