I swear she didn't look like that last week.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
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