Got a toothbrush?
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
