happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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