Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
