I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
