Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
