i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
